NOW I TOTALLY WANT TO BUY THIS…

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Sunday Comic: I Think My Kids May Need To Go Back to ‘School’

Today’s Sunday Comic comes direct from my kids mouths.

We were discussing recent world events the other night. We typically do this at dinner.

Connor rolls his eyes and says: “Geez, mom, the next thing I know you will be adopting kids from Heidi”

then Carter laughs and says “No, she will be buying children from a-freek-a”

*No, they were not trying to be funny. Yes, they watch the news. No, I have no idea why they apparently are geographically-phonetically challenged. No, I do not plan to  have any more children much less by buying them.

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Sunday Comic: Why Boys Need Parents

Today’s Sunday Comic comes from an email from my cousin. Thanks Roger!

Disclaimer: I don’t claim to be original. This is a forward of a forward of a forward email thing. If I find out who original credit goes to, you know I will give it.

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Sunday Comic

My friend Lisa sent this to me via email. I have no idea who to credit, so deal & enjoy!:)

A MAN WHO KNOWS HIS MATH

He writes: I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver, who cut right in front of a pickup truck, causing the driver to drive onto the shoulder to avoid hitting her.

This evidently angered the driver enough that he hung his arm out his window and gave the woman the finger.

‘Man, that guy is stupid,’ I thought to myself. I ALWAYS smile nicely and wave in a sheepish manner whenever a female does anything to me in traffic, and here’s why:

I drive 48 miles each way every day to work. That’s 96 miles each day. Of these, 16 miles each way is bumper-to bumper Most of the bumper-to-bumper is on an 8 lane highway. There are 7 cars every 40 feet for 32 miles. That works out to 982 cars every mile, or 31,424 cars. Even though the rest of the 32 miles is notbumper-to-bumper, I figure I pass at least another 4000 cars. That brings the number to something like 36,000 cars that I pass every day. Statistically, females drive half of these. That’s 18,000 women drivers! In any given group of females, 1 in 28 has PMS. That’s 642. According to Cosmopolitan, 70% describe their love life as dissatisfying or unrewarding. That’s 449. According to the National Institute of Health, 22% of all females have seriously considered suicide or homicide. That’s 98. And 34% describe men as their biggest problem. That’s 33. According to the National Rifle Association, 5% of all females carry weapons and this number is increasing.

That means that EVERY SINGLE DAY, I drive past at least one female that has a lousy love life, thinks men are her biggest problem, has seriously considered suicide or homicide, has PMS, and is armed.

Give her the finger?

I don’t think so.

No Nativity Scene in Washington This Year!

Photo Credit:krisdecurtis

The Supreme Court has ruled that there cannot be a Nativity Scene in the United States Capital this Christmas season.

This isn’t for any religious reason.

They simply have not been able to find Three Wise Men in the Nation’s Capitol.

A search for a Virgin continues.

There was no problem, however, finding enough asses to fill the stable.

**My mom sent this to me via email which was a forward of a forward of a forward. You know the deal. If I knew the original author I would give credit, but I don’t. Just thought we could all use a giggle