Once upon a time I wrote an article on how to host a blog giveaway. But with all the blog changes I have going on I began doing some research on blog giveaways and realized it is just not something I am comfortable with anymore. Lots of blogs are writing about the subject and I have had a few very smart conversations with friends regarding this topic. Let’s begin with why I personally choose not to run blog giveaways going forward.

• A month ago a ran a giveaway here on the blog to win a field trip with my family. I got ONE entry! Big ego slap! But I puzzled and I puzzled til my puzzler hurt and then I finally asked some friends why they didn’t enter. The biggest two reasons were that my friends see me all the time anyway and they are totally over blog contests. Fair enough. I realized my readers (friends and family) don’t come here for a chance to win something. That made me happy.
• I started having conversations with smart friends in social media who brought up the fact that blog contests may not be exactly legal. I did some research (easy to read discussions here, here, here, here, here and here) and found there is a lot of gray in this area. I don’t monetize this blog and don’t really care (other than my ego) how many readers I have so why would I risk the thin ice here?
• Whispered conversations of how some blog contests are faked. It’s scary to announce a friend won your contest because you are afraid everyone is going to say “its obviously rigged” but then how can you ask your friends to enter? Weird double edged sword there. While 98% (randomly made up number) of all bloggers are completely honest and forthcoming, I don’t want to be lumped in with the few that aren’t because mostly all of my readers are personal friends. I can see the disclosure now: “Entries open to US Residents 18 and older and who don’t know my real hair color“….which is gray, so now you are all not eligible. Sorry!
• I started getting statements from PR firms to the effect: Please clearly state that this is not our contest. We are just providing you with a prize for your giveaway. Bells went off here.

So after my above reasons some of you may be wondering what laws I am worried about.  Let me try to break it down as best I can and try to help you avoid some of the pitfalls if you run giveaways.  It’s important to understand the terminology used in a lottery (all definitions below from this link. I bolded what is common in blog giveaways.

Prize: Anything of value the sponsor awards in a promotion. For example goods/services with a monetary value or items of intrinsic value.

Chance: A process beyond the participant’s direct control determines the outcome. A few examples of chance are a random sweepstakes drawing or an instant win/collect and win game; ultimately luck is the deciding factor.

Consideration: Anything that requires a participant to expend a monetary amount or significant effort to participate. For example the purchase of a product, multiple store or internet visits, correctly answering trivia questions, downloading a file, or attendance at sales presentations.

So the first thing here is to avoid running an illegal lottery you have to remove one of the above. The easiest is consideration. Don’t ask people to visit another website and return to yours to comment. Make it as easy as someone leaving you a comment with only the contact info necessary to award prize. Eliminate “extra entries”.

“Sweepstakes are regulated by both state and federal law. Sweepstakes (typically random drawings for prizes) possess two of the three characteristics of a lottery: chance and a prize. Therefore, to avoid classification as a lottery, a sweepstakes promotion must not involve consideration.”-Contests and Sweepstakes

Use the third party draw service from random.org This goes beyond the little screenshot image that some bloggers post and keeps a record for winners and losers for 5 years. It documents that every entry was actually given a fair shot and documents date/time.

You could, also, run a contest. Contests remove the element of chance.

“Contests take a number of different forms. Anything where you can display a skill or a special attribute, from cooking and essay contests to cutest kid and bikini contests, is fair game”-Contests & Sweepstakes

My advice here would be to use another judging agent (the contest sponsor or impartial third party) to pick the winner. That way your best friend can enter and if her kid really is deemed to be the cutest by the third party, great. Always include rules! and remember that while the rules in the US are confuzzling enough, I have heard adding Canada into the mix can be really rough.

I have run giveaways doing pretty much everything above. I am not an attorney (not even close) nor should any of this be taken as legal advice. It is just a compilation of reasons why I am no longer comfortable running giveaways. It’s confusing stuff and just not worth it to me considering all the work involved. Before you run your next giveway please follow the advice here from the FTC.

…each state has laws that may require promoters to make disclosures, seek licensing, or post a bond. Since state laws vary, check with the Attorney General’s Office in the state(s) in which you plan to advertise.

Thoughts???

I recently redid most of my media kits after attending the EVO Conference Before and After: Sales & Monetization. I learned a lot from listening to Stephanie Schwab discuss the elements that make a media kit successful so I would like to pass some of that advice on to you.

Here is a media kit that I created for the Spina Bifida Support Forum. I am showing it here as a slide show but you can see how it looks neatly packed into a .pdf as well. Also, the conversion online screwed up the font running the url at the bottom. That is not how it looks when it goes to potential sponsors. There are some other weird formatting things the slide show did so do look at the pdf to compare.

This is a small forum with the sole purpose of supporting those that live with the same conditions my son does. I used Microsoft Powerpoint 2010 to create the design of the slides then converted it into a .pdf using Adobe Acrobat Professional. If you don’t have similar programs available to you you can always use google docs for free.

Identification: Name and Logo. Include a clear description of what the doc is.

Contents: What will people find in this document? I choose to add many photos throughout this kit as a way to further brand the site. I wanted to make the kit compelling and interesting. Since the site is a community, pictures of our members make sense here. Pictures are worth a thousand words. Communicate what your site is about through well places photos.

About Your Site: Trick here is to clearly communicate who you are and what your site is about clearly and conscisely. This is not the place to post your whole bio.

Site Statistics: There are many places that you can garner your stats from and all will be very different. Some tools to use to check your stats are Google Analytics, Lijit, Compete, or Quantcast. These all require that you either register an account and insert some code on your site or submit the url for tracking. Take the time to make sure you are understanding your blog statistics. I use a program called Jing to grab screenshots. There is a free and paid version. I use the paid but the free should be just fine for grabbing quick stat screenshots. Make sure you clearly identify where your stats are coming from and when.

Demographics: Since this is an international community and I am not just necessarily looking for US sponsors, I choose to include the top ten countries the readers are from. If you drill down farther in this area in your google analytics you can information on states or areas that may be important in going after local sponsors.

Site Reach: Where are you in social media? This site doesn’t use twitter but I included facebook. I pulled my inbound links (which are really high) from webmaster central. You use Search Status firefox add-on for the google page rank and alexa ranking.

Site Usage: I choose to highlight my US demographics here because Quantcast does an awesome job of making me a nice, neat little picture of who our US readers are.

Advertising Opportunities: Banner Ads: To grab the screenshot of the entire page I used SnagIt. There is a free 30 day trial. I added the arrows and text in powerpoint. Some things to think about here are if you are comfortable using a banner rotation program or if you want just one static ad. $5 per 1,000 impressions or page views (cpm) seems to be fairly standard in ad pricing. So using that as a guide I may want to aim for making $450/month off my top banner. With this being the first time venturing into private ad sales on this site I went for 5 $75 slots. That will most certainly change over time.

Advertising Opportunities: Sponsored Posts: If you are going to run sponsored posts you need to clearly define your boundaries. How many links can it have? Are you writing it or the sponsor? How will you clearly make sure to disclose it? In my example this is a forum post so the rules are a little different but you get the idea.

Advertising Opportunities: Sponsored Travel: This is where you can describe any upcoming conferences you want to attend or  travel opportunities you might be interested in. Explain what you would be willing to do in exchange for travel and why a company should invest in you

Contact Information: I use a UPS mail box for anything related to my blog. UPS boxes are great because many companies won’t ship to PO Boxes so using UPS gives you a physical address. They have permission to sign for all my packages avoiding me having to wait around and they send me a text when something is delivered. The phone listed is my cell. I would not be comfortable listing my house.

Some additional things not included in this kit that you might want to add:

Reviews/Giveaways: Do you do them? What are your guidelines? Will you return products? Mail to winners? What is your average turn around time? What types of items work best for your readers? Do you charge a fee? Show an example of a successful giveaway you have done.

Press/Media: Where has your site been featured? Give excerpts if you can. Have a campaign that performed really well? Include a testimonial from the brand. Pictures are great here.

Editorial Calendar: What are you writing about this year? Stephanie has a great roundup of posts about editorial calendars on her site.

That ought to give you enough to work on for the next two weeks. In the next PR Monday post I will be talking about now that you have this awesome media kit, what the heck do you do with it.

One more thing: I have opened up my Blog Frog community to share pr opportunities and advice so make sure you join me over there!

Have any advice that I didn’t think of? Programs you use? Something you just want to tell me? I love comments and questions so leave ‘em!

O M G- I just returned from the best blog conference I have ever attended, EVO10 and I have so much to share with you all about PR, brands, relationships and the evolution of this wild, wild west atmosphere we are all currently in. There were so many brilliant speakers and one on one conversations that I had and I promise to keep sharing those this summer but this is a conversation that I had with a very lovely, smart and genuine pr rep, Karie Reynolds at Grand Avenue PR. We shared a shuttle back to the airport so keep in mind I was running on a lack of coffee so  this is at best paraphrased.

• Make Your Pitches Relevant- As bloggers we constantly moan and groan about the completely irrelevant pitches we get sent. Apparently some reps feel the same way, completely contradicting the advice I once gave. Thus, proving the evolution of our world. Do your homework. Most reps work with many brands. Tell them specifically what clients and products you want to work with and why. For example

My name is ____________, I blog at __________________. I am having a new baby and writing about my experience. I have seen the new ______________ made by __________________ and would like to try it out. Are you currently sending out samples?

• Your Offline Reach Is Important! USE IT!- You may be new to blogging and your stats aren’t overly impressive. Do you lead a moms group? PTA president? Church group? What are you doing offline? Using the above example tell the rep where that product is going to be seen. Reps realize that stats aren’t always the most important indicator of your reach and nothing replaces their product getting in real life (IRL) exposure.
• Forget The Old Model of Review- Your readers are most likely tuning out your posts that are just a review of a product (unless you run a specific review blog). Let’s face it, they recognize it as a commercial. So the trick is to incorporate that product into your existing posts. Take a look at my Boot Camp post and how at the end I included a movie I was sent to review. What I would do differently now after talking to Karie is that instead of including the street date (which is important to that particular company) I would link to their site with the press release. The value in me mentioning that to the brand is that my readers now know it is out again. No one is going to mark their calendars and rush out to buy it on that actual date.
• Help A Rep Out- Be a connector in this space. This is totally something I practice. If I get sent a pitch that just doesn’t work for me but I have a relationship with the rep I will try to connect them with a blogging friend that will work. It’s the Pitch Posse effect. I actually think I may try to post more of these when I have permission in the Blog Star community so watch for them.

What do you think of these tips? Anything you are going to try?

I wrote this a bit ago and was just going to pass it on to friends who need to increase their blog security but I have seen so many hacked wordpress blogs lately that I hope by posting it I am able to help someone else remove a blog virus and protect themselves from going through this in the first place.

These steps apply to self hosted wordpress blogs. If you have been attacked then you should ideally get go through each step systematically. If you have not, it is still in your best interest to take action on as many of the preventative measures as possible.

BACK UP USING THE EXPORT FUNCTION OF YOUR WP ADMIN BEFORE STARTING. IT IS ALSO A GOOD IDEA TO USE FTP TO BACKUP YOUR CUSTOM THEME FILES!!!

1. Make sure you have the most current ftp download version on your computer. I like and trust Smart FTP. As of writing this the most current version is 4.0. It is a paid program. It initially costs around $60. It is worth it.
2. Login to cpanel (at the host level) and change the password. Make it easy you are going to change it again.
3. Login to wp-admin and change the password. Make it easy you are going to change it again.
4. While changing your password in the wp-admin check for any strange admins that may have registered. There should only be you and whoever else you gave priveledges to. I had at least one weird one on each infected blog. One was named MYSQL and the other was Feedburner. They are fake users. You may also find that you have one or two ‘hidden’. You need to follow these steps to get rid of them: http://bit.ly/ap1bHP
5. Next make sure that you are using the most current version of wordpress and all your plugins. Update any as necessary through you smartftp.
6. If you are all update to date congrats but you are still going to overwrite all your files with a fresh download of wp and all plugins. Do this in smartftp and make sure you OVERWRITE the files.
7. Now that the files are updated take a look in smartftp for anything unusual. Sort the files by date modified. You will most likely find a strange file or two. Compare the file list to the new versions you just uploaded. See anything that doesn’t belong? I found index.main.php and lots of other strangely worded index and cat pages. Double check that they are not part of the wp download and then delete them.
8. Take a look at your .htaccess file in your root. It should only have this unless you are using some plugins like wp-cache that would re-write it. Even so, those plugins should clearly identify themselves. Code should be:

# BEGIN WordPress

RewriteEngine On
RewriteBase /
RewriteCond %{REQUEST_FILENAME} !-f
RewriteCond %{REQUEST_FILENAME} !-d
RewriteRule . /index.php [L]

# END WordPress

You will more than likely find that your .htaccess has been changed. Edit to the above code, reupload and then change file permissions to 644 (see 12 if you don’t know how to do that)

9. Install these three plugins: http://bit.ly/IFH60, http://www.seoegghead.com/software/wordpress-firewall.seo, and http://ocaoimh.ie/exploit-scanner/ and activate them all
10. Run exploit scanner. You will find it under the dashboard link. It probably won’t find anything but do it anyway.
11. Run Security. This will likely be down at the very bottom on your left column. It will probably give you a list of things in red that they find. We are going to fix those next.
12. Run Security-Scanner. Here are all your file permissions that are out of whack. You need to fix these in smartftp. You click on the file, then right click, then hit properties, view the permissions tab and change it to whatever they tell you.
13. Now click back to Security-security. These are the things we are going to fix. WARNING! You NEED to know your way around your database for this. Don’t attempt if you are not completely comfortable. You have to do this to make your wp as secure as possible so you may need to get some help if you are unsure what you are doing.
14. Login to your cpanel and go to “Mysql Databases”. Under current databases delete the user that is there. There should only be one. Go back. Add a new user with a very strong password. Give that user permission to access that database. It should have all permissions.
15. Now go back to cpanel-home. Navigate to ‘phpmyadmin’. Back up your database. If you need a reminder read: http://codex.wordpress.org/Backing_Up_Your_Database
16. Follow the steps here to change your wp_ prefix: http://semperfiwebdesign.com/documentation/wp-security-scan/change-wordpress-database-table-name-prefix/
17. Go to SmartFTP. Edit wp-config in your root (public-html unless you have your blog in a folder) with the new password and the new db prefix. Use the wp link provided to change your secret keys too. Save and reupload.
18. Remove your newly loaded wp-config to one level up. This means if it is in public_html you are going to drag it all the way to the ip folder up top and drop it in those ip numbers. If your blog is in a folder than don’t do this.
19. Just double check that everything is OK. If you are prompted to re-install wp you did something wrong .Don’t panic. Just repeat steps 16, 17, 18
20. Now back to the database. Click on Structure. Click on _users, browse. Edit admin. Change admin to your new user name. You will change it in 2 or 3 spots depending on how you had it set up to begin with. You will login to wp with that name now instead of the default “admin”.
21. Go to wordpress admin panel. You will be prompted to re-login in with your new user name.
22. Clicking on Security-Security again the last thing in red you should see is a prompt about putting .htaccess in the wp-admin folder. If you consistently access your panel from one or two computers with a static IP then this is a GREAT security step. However if you use a dynamic IP and/or access your wp panel from other computers don’t do this. If you share this blog with someone else you need to put there ips in as well. Follow this article: http://www.wpbeginner.com/wp-tutorials/protect-your-admin-folder-in-wordpress-by-limiting-access-in-htaccess
23. Install a database back up plugin: http://wordpress.org/extend/plugins/wp-db-backup/ Have a copy emailed to yourself depending on the frequency you post. Note on this: I had to manually create the file on smartftp on each blog I installed it on. Make sure after you create the folder and the plugin installs correctly to change the permissions back to 777. Have it emailed to you so that it does not stay on the server with a 777 permission code
24. Change your wp-admin password and cpanel password to something strong. Write these down!
25. Last but not least: re-run both Security and Exploit plugins. Re login and out. Check everything. You should be good to go and way more secure than ever.

Last week I had a great lunch with some blogging friends and Chris Byrne, The Toy Guy. The topic of conversation eventually turned to moms and reviews and giveaways. We all agreed on this basic truth: Your reputation in blogging is all you really have. Being a somewhat anonymous venue it is hard sometimes to remember that everything you do and say contributes to that reputation whether positively or negatively. But at the end of the day and all the SEO and traffic tricks out there, if people don’t trust you the gig is up.

So, how do you focus on being trust worthy?

• Be consistent with your social media. Your personality on your blog should be YOU and YOU should be YOU across all venues. Don’t fall victim to multiple blogger personality syndrome.
• If you take a PR opp, DO IT! Sadly it doesn’t always happen. Communicate with the PR Rep if you are having issues getting an opp done. They are depending on you but they also understand that we are moms first. Communicating is really all they ask.
• Make sure any sponsored posts or ads fit into your value system and personality of your blog.
• Take giveaways seriously. Get your winner their prizes asap.
• Manage your offline personality. There shouldn’t be any separation in this day and age. Choices you make in real life will affect your online reputation.
• Being real doesn’t mean being nasty (unless you really are). Also, if you get a product to review don’t write something fabulous if you don’t mean it. Talk about the pros and cons of products. No one will be believe you if everything you write about is the most fabulous thing on earth.
• Write reviews about stuff you pay for too (I said too because there is nothing wrong with getting things for review).

Bottom line is that your readers (and PR reps) have a lot of options on where they can go. Be real, genuine, and trustworthy and you will be around a long time

Sadly it seems that the middle ground for the pitches I receive is rapidly disappearing. I either get really, really great pitches or really, really bad ones. This is one of those that falls in the really bad category. I want to share it with some of you to show WHY I think this is a pitch that most people should pass on. I know when you are new to this you get all bubbly when a PR firm picks you and it is easy to get tricked into taking all the pitches that come your way. So lets dissect this one and if you still think it is worth your time at the end that is OK! We all have our things we will work for peanuts for. Just be educated about when you are doing it.

Hi, I have an item that you may like for your Blog. Blah Blah Company (I changed the name), a leading provider of school uniforms, this week launched a $15,000 contest in which kids who attend a school that has a dress code can show the world what makes them unique and special. The contest is titled, “Blah Blah Contest,” and it is designed to provide a forum for kids to express their individuality. Kids and their parents can enter the contest by visiting www.blahblah.com and following the instructions regarding submitting a video or essay along with pictures. The final day to submit an entry is September 15.

OK, so lets look at this in specific regards to me. I HOMESCHOOL. Now, I do say that my older one is going to Catholic school next year so maybe that was their thought but he has a liberal dress code so right off the bat I am not interested.

The link above? Right now has a google page rank of 0 and an alexa rank in the 4 millions.

On November 1, Blah Blah  will be posting the 10 finalists and the public will be able to vote for the grand prize winner – who will win $10,000 in cash and their school will receive $5,000 in vouchers from Blah Blah. The grand prize winner will be announced on November 30.

More than 1 in 5 public schools now have a dress code, and that’s on top of the many private, parochial and charter schools that have dress codes. Please let me know if you need any additional information, or if you’d like to speak to someone at Blah Blah.

As part of this outreach to parents and kids, Blah Blah is looking for 25 Blah Blah Brand Ambassadors (the first 25 who respond in the affirmative), who will help make moms and kids aware of the contest. As a Blah Blah Brand Ambassador, we will expect:

OK, this is where is gets good. Ready?

–         A total of three mentions/discussions of the contest – 1) A mention of the contest on your blog during the first two weeks of the contest, a follow-on mention/discussion in June, and a third in September.

–         At least two mentions – 1 in May and another in June – of our contest to your followers and fans on Twitter and Facebook

So, they want a total of three blog posts and 2 mentions to my social networks. Lets do the math. I get at least $10 for each ‘commercial’ tweet I send through Sponsored Tweets (referral link) So, I could make $20 for those two social network contacts leaving me $30 to run 3 posts on my blog.

We have established that this blog is not really the most organic place for this so these posts fall into ‘advertising’ in my book. Depending on which blog, time of year and my schedule I charge anywhere from $100-$300 for a sponsored post, usually around $250. I know putting my rates out there may be silly but honestly new bloggers need to know that $10 a post is INSANE. $10 for a tweet–sure, not bad, but a mention in a post? No freakin’ way. I should say, I can get that on some of my niche blogs (and I really don’t post advertorials here) but in talking with other bloggers I have found out their rates are $30-$75 per 300 word post. I, also, want to clarify that this is for a post that is ‘advertising’ not a product review or editorial for something that is organic to your blog. I don’t charge beyond the product for those.

In return, Blah Blah will provide a reciprocal link to your site on the Blahblah.com site and a $50 gift certificate after your last posting in September.

A link? On a PR 0 site? Oh yeah….I covered that above.

That giftcard? Given the average mark-up of 43% for family clothing they are really paying you $28.50 that you can only spend in their store. That $5.70 for your five points of contact. Minimum wage in my state is currently $7.24. Granted those 5 points of contact are probably not going to take you 5 hours. It took you a hell of a lot longer than that if you figure in the time you put building your blog audience and social networks. To essentially have a company come bless you with the opportunity to use your platform for less than minimum wage.
Sadly, I am sure they were flooded with responses. Mine was this:

Thanks for your pitch. However, you do realize you are compensating bloggers less than $10 per post…

I currently charge $250 for a featured post on my tween blog in cash, not a gift card to the company. Thanks

Something interesting: I did a quick scan and according to PayScale.com the average full time journalist position in the US pays $26,000-$47,000 a year. If you go on the low side of $30,000 a year and you post 350 times that year you would be making $85 a post. Even if you aren’t interested in being a full time blogger, you are a media source! You are a journalist.

Mom-101 wrote a great post about this as well. I hope you go read it. For some reason I can’t link direct to her post but right now it is the third one down.

We all do things to get “in” with a company but take it from me, the pitches from these companies don’t tend to get better.

I will leave you with this….

you work really hard on your blog, don’t let someone take advantage of you!

Since we are all working on our own, I think it really helps to know what average rates are. I would love it if you shared yours below or any other thoughts on this.

I do and I couldn’t make it without them!

What the heck is a pitch posse you ask?

My terms for ‘my girls’….the ones who hook me up with pitches they are doing or need to pass on.

My pitch posse knows who they are so need to out them but my goodness they hook me up. Hint: look at the pic

So, do you have a pitch posse?

No???

You need to get one.

How?

Find some other bloggers that are about on the same ‘level’ as you but are a little different. Two of my posse gals have kids younger than me and one has girls. So, when I get a pitch that is good, but not really a good fit for me, I pass it right on to them. They do the same.

A word of caution: know those in your pitch posse well enough to stick your neck out for them. There is nothing more embarrassing than recommending someone and having them totally flake.

Be a good posse member…regularly pass on pitches and believe me your circle and good karma continues to grow.

Find bloggers not as experienced as you. Get that pitch you would have jumped on 6 months ago but are now too busy for? Pass it on.

Be a connector in this web and you will reap benefits beyond the one time pitch.

Need to connect with other bloggers? The Blog Frog is a great place to do that. Head over and join. It is free!

UGH! It is 5 pm on Monday and I still don’t have my PR Monday Post up. I usually write it on Sunday but we spent the weekend unsuccessfully furniture shopping. This AM I ran to Boot Camp, then ran home, picked up one kid for an appointment, dropped him off, turned right back around and picked up the other. Spent almost 4 hours at the eye doctor and ordering glasses for them both. Looks like the youngest is blind as bat. I feel like a great mother. I swear his eyes were checked two years ago. Then it was off to grab something to put in their growling stomachs and back to Barnes and Noble to get Romeo & Juliet in a version Con could half way understand and A Tale of Two Cities, both need to be read ASAP for K12. PHEEWWW! I am exhausted just typing all that and I still have dinner to make. Which brings me to why Dustin’s guest post could not be more timely!

Spending Too Much Time Online? 5 Tips to Master the Virtual Balancing Act

If you are reading this post, it’s probably safe to assume that you enjoy spending time online. You’re probably a busy parent, and you may even be a fellow blogger.

Do you sometimes feel like maybe you are spending too much of your time on the internet? I know from my own experience how difficult it can be sometimes to find a healthy balance between your activities online and your other responsibilities back in the “real world” of a busy family life.

I certainly don’t have all of the answers. However, as someone who spends a lot of my time blogging to try to provide practical and motivational marriage advice at Engaged Marriage, I do have a lot of experience with this struggle. On top of my online work, I also have a wonderful wife, two little kids (and one on the way), a full-time professional career, a good deal of community service and a lot of other demands for my time.

Sound familiar?

5 Tips to Help Find a Healthy Online-Offline Balance

Whether you are a blogger or just an active reader and member of the online community, it is easy to let your internet time impact your family life. We all know this is not what we want, but what can we do to be proactive and make sure it doesn’t become (or remain) a problem?

Here are some tips that should help keep your spouse happy and your family supportive of your online activities:

1. Make the “Real World” Your Top Priority

I love blogging, and I also love interacting on Facebook and Twitter.

However, you really need to take a step back and make sure you have your priorities straight. If you have a family (and you like them and would prefer that they stick around), you cannot let your blog trump your love and attention to them. Set your priorities, communicate them clearly and then let your actions confirm your good intentions.

2. Set Healthy Boundaries

The best way to stay true to your priorities is to create some boundaries with your time. For example, I have established a “no computer time” rule for myself where I don’t use the laptop (or my smart phone) between the time I get home from work and when we get the kids to bed. By setting up this boundary, I free my time and my mind to enjoy my children, play outside or help my wife out with dinner each evening.

Tell your spouse about your boundaries and encourage them to let you know if they see you slipping and not holding true to your commitments. Your family should be your best accountability partner, and they’ll know better than anyone when they feel like you’re not keeping them your top priority.

3. Sacrifice Personal Time, Not Family Time

Whether you are playing Farmville or running an online business, it’s important that you don’t let your family time suffer as a result of the time you spend online. The best way to handle this and keep a proper balance is to limit your internet use to your own personal time. Maybe you write a blog post instead of watching T.V. or taking a nap, but you shouldn’t be missing your date night with your spouse or your daughter’s soccer practice to play around on Twitter.

4. Set Aside Time to Talk

Aside from our “no computer time” each day, my wife and I have found that setting aside a little time to just talk to each other has been a tremendous benefit to our relationship (which also makes us better parents). Honestly, if you simply commit to spending 15 minutes per day “being a couple,” it can have a meaningful impact on your life together.

I just released a “marriage mini-course for busy people” called 7 Steps to Reclaim Your Couple Time, and it’s totally free if you want to learn more about this idea.

5. Spend Some Online Time Improving Your Offline Life

One of the best things about the internet, and especially the blogging community, is the availability of really high-quality information to help you improve your life. Whether you are reading here at Elementary Spirits, checking out my site or spending time on any of the thousands of incredible sites in the blogosphere (and beyond), you have an opportunity to learn and get inspired to do better in “real life” with your family.

In fact, you are doing that right now…well done!

What Additional Advice Do You Have to Share?

I hope that you found these tips helpful in your efforts to find a healthy balance between the time you spend online and offline. I really believe that with the right boundaries and a positive approach, you can enjoy your time online and also have the awesome marriage and healthy life that your entire family deserves.

So, what additional tips would you like to share on this topic?

___________________________________________

Dustin Riechmann created Engaged Marriage as source of marriage advice for young couples who want to have a happy family life. Please sign up for free updates and check out the Marriage Time newsletter to become part of a thriving community that is working together to improve everything from their spirituality to their sex lives.

Following on from last weeks great advice from mom bloggers who successfully work with PR, let’s get to it:

Don’t sell yourself, or your audience short.  Only give your honest opinion. If you lie, your audience will eventually figure it out (after all EVERYTHING can’t be the most fabulous thing ever) and they will leave.  If you have no audience the companies won’t be interested in you any more. . . everyone loses.

Not every blogger is born to morph into a review blogging-butterfly….if reviews aren’t your thing- be honest- there other ways to work with a brand

Make the company ship the prizes. “It’s my policy to have the company do order fulfillment-I will provide you with the name of the winner when the giveaway is complete.”

Saying yes to every pitch is not the road to “big time blogger” status… its road to sleepless nights of writing about toothpaste and posts that readers are probably skipping over

Important Reminder: I, also, wanted to let you know that I was asked by a good friend who is a PR rep in the mom blogging world to do a monthly twitter chat. The Blog Frog will be there participating as well.  More info to follow but save April 5th at 9 pm EST for our first #prmonday chat. This is NOT a prize twitter party. It is a conversation about PR that you can openly ask your questions and get some advice.

What other advice do you have?

I reached out to some amazing bloggers that I am happy to have as friends on your behalf. I asked them, “What is the one thing you wish someone had told you when you started working with PR?” and boy did they deliver! From post worthy comments to some of the best one lines of advice, here is what those who have “made it” have to tell you as you start this journey:

Brands need you!… you don’t need brands!

Don’t be afraid to ask for a giveaway when you are doing a review. Keep it simple “My policy is only to do a review if I do an associated giveaway. Would you be able to provide one for a giveaway?”

Remember-your time is worthwhile-you should only do things that give value to you and your blog.

Its ok to not like a product- brands that do social media right, appreciate your honesty and try to use your feedback on improving their product… and if they don’t have that outlook with their reviewers, eh- Who needs them?

Your readers come back to your site because of the content you write about, if its not relative- its ok to say no. There will be plenty, and I mean PLENTY of relative pitches coming your way. Don’t get side tracked

Do not agree to review a product and then drop the ball. When you do, it not only makes you look bad- it makes the entire blogging community look like sample-whores.. which we are not.

More advice coming next week. What do you think? Agree with the above? Have some advice of your own? Speak out in the comments!